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dearmargaretDear Margaret: I am newly retired and anticipated my freedom with great excitement. Here I am in week three feeling alone and unproductive. I have visited with my former co-workers during their workday, but my visits seem to be an intrusion. I don't have a hobby and feel lost. My circle of friends never included anyone outside of those with whom I worked for the past several years. I didn't really like my job and thought this retreat into retirement would be much more satisfying than it has turned out to be. I feel like I'm slipping into such sadness. How can I find satisfaction in this new stage of life?
Lost in Retirement
 
Dear Lost in Retirement:  Most people make more extensive plans for a week or two off from work than they do for retirement. Your job, whether or not you liked it, provided you with structure. You got up at a certain time, planned what to wear, thought about your to-do-list, and decided how you would spend evenings and weekends. Just as your skeleton provides the vital framework for the structure of your body, human beings need structure to frame their lives. Without architecture to guide our daily activities, we could easily resort to staying in our PJs till noon and beginning cocktail hour at 2 p.m. It's important to add discipline back to your new life. Decide what time to arise, get dressed, and tackle a to-do-list. I can't emphasize enough the importance of staying active. Include a morning walk or other form of movement in your day – every day. Make a list of things you have always been curious about, and then follow your curiosity! Community is a vital part of existence. What organizations appeal to you? Look in your community for spiritual organizations, book clubs, pottery classes, cooking lessons – anything that sounds interesting to you. Then become involved. Lastly, find a way to give back. Each individual has unique talents, and when you shut yourself off from society, everyone loses. You don't benefit from the satisfaction of giving of yourself, and others lose the benefit of receiving guidance from someone who's "been there."


Click Here to write to Dear Margaret.  Margaret Snow is a Life Coach in Ithaca, NY.

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