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Jan
06
2006
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by Jim Evans
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Friday, 06 January 2006 |
 SMART TALK
By Dr. Shirley Glibb
PASSIVE VOICE: Some weekends at the Institute for the Linguistically Impaired, the staff meets at the Fowler Lounge to relax and vent. After we loosen up with a few schooners of sarsaparilla, we enjoy inventing special hells for those who love passive verbs.
You know, as in it was decided at the meeting that a new bus will be procured. Meeting minutes are full of tripe like this. I will be made sick if I go on.
Nurse Clara Dix calls the use of passive verbs wusstalk. The speaker or writer of passive verbs is afraid to take responsibility for a simple fact.
I think these wimps should go to a hell where they must always use passive verbs and say things to each other such as, “You are loved by me.”
Isn’t that romantic?
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v2i1
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Jan
06
2006
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by Ben Veaner
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Friday, 06 January 2006 |
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v2i1
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Jan
06
2006
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by Wendy Woods
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Friday, 06 January 2006 |
ITHACA, NY: The Kitchen Theatre Company continues its 2005/06 - 15th Anniversary MAIN STAGE Season with Tony & the Soprano, a brand new musical comedy with book and lyrics by Rachel Lampert, original music by Larry Pressgrove and arrangements of classical opera by Richard Montgomery. This original musical play was commissioned and workshopped by the Kitchen Theatre with a cast of seven. It begins previews on Thursday, January 12 at 7:30pm, opens Saturday, January 14, and runs through Saturday, February 11, 2006.
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Dec
23
2005
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by Ben Veaner
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Friday, 23 December 2005 |
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v1i23
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Dec
23
2005
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by Jim Evans
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Friday, 23 December 2005 |
SMART TALK
By Garrell S. Utter, N.P.
PERIOD OF TIME: At the Institute for the Linguistically Impaired, we consider using period of time or time period an early symptom of the dreaded William F. Buckley Syndrome. The patient’s speech is not just redundant, it’s just too wordy, as if the patient must have just one more second of your attention, so you can admire his or her vocabulary.
Early in the last century, the great W.C. Fields pioneered the syndrome for comic effect, saying, for instance altercation in the thoroughfare instead of street fight.
If we catch Buckley Syndrome in this early stage, however, we can cure it with intensive therapy. The patient can learn to say time or period. They can also learn to say in two weeks. In two weeks’ time isn’t only redundant (and fatuous), it’s also as pretentious as I feel badly.
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v1i23
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