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Dec
23
2005
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by Ben Veaner
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Friday, 23 December 2005 |
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Dec
23
2005
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by Jim Evans
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Friday, 23 December 2005 |
SMART TALK By Garrell S. Utter, N.P.
PERIOD OF TIME: At the Institute for the Linguistically Impaired, we consider using period of time or time period an early symptom of the dreaded William F. Buckley Syndrome. The patient’s speech is not just redundant, it’s just too wordy, as if the patient must have just one more second of your attention, so you can admire his or her vocabulary.
Early in the last century, the great W.C. Fields pioneered the syndrome for comic effect, saying, for instance altercation in the thoroughfare instead of street fight.
If we catch Buckley Syndrome in this early stage, however, we can cure it with intensive therapy. The patient can learn to say time or period. They can also learn to say in two weeks. In two weeks’ time isn’t only redundant (and fatuous), it’s also as pretentious as I feel badly.
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Dec
16
2005
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by Jim Evans
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Friday, 16 December 2005 |
SMART TALK By Dr. Shirley Glibb
The Institute for the Linguistically Impaired is, of course, in Texas. At our facility in Underbelly, the seat of Lengua Loco County, we spend most of our time treating patients for Redundancy Disorder. To borrow a coinage of a native son who deserves to remain nameless, we don’t misunderestimate the magnitude of our task.
But imagine my dismay at seeing redundancies printed large in ads and on labels, such as free gift. Clearly, some potential patients escape us.
I was shocked again today, walking into a book store’s coffee shop. There, displayed on a rack, sat boxes labeled Chai Tea. Don’t the drink’s producers know that chai means tea? It’s a tea preparation from Central Asia, heavily flavored with spices and diluted with milk. Yak milk, if it’s authentic.
Saying chai tea is like saying soda pop, or like the advice to drink liquids.
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Dec
16
2005
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by Ben Veaner
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Friday, 16 December 2005 |
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Dec
09
2005
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by Ben Veaner
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Friday, 09 December 2005 |
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