dearmargaretDear Margaret: I've been estranged from my sister for the past 14 years. I found out a few months ago that I have a life threatening illness. My family takes grudge holding to the level of an art form, and my sister and I are no exceptions. However, if I don't regain my health, I worry that I'll leave this earth without a clear conscience. I don't have a particular religious affiliation and I'm not sure about my beliefs in a divine being. I simply don't want to depart with unresolved issues. I've called my sister on a few occasions and left messages each time, but she will not respond. Any ideas on how I can make this right?
Clearing My Conscience

Dear Clearing My Conscience: I'm sorry about your health issues. This certainly makes for a time when you are soul searching and reflecting over your past. I understand your desire to part with no regrets, if that is the outcome. Let's focus on the soul searching part. If you were in perfect health, would your desire still be to make amends with your sister? I do not say this with harshness or judgment. If not, perhaps she detects what she might consider insincerity. With that in mind, write her a letter and express your deepest feelings about your relationship with her, and offer your apologies where necessary. Know that she may return the letter unopened. If she rejects your letter, you may have done all you can to repair your relationship.

Click Here to write to Dear Margaret.  Margaret Snow is a Life Coach in Ithaca, NY.

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