dearmargaretDear Margaret: A few weeks ago my daughter borrowed my car as hers was in for repair. When I got it back, the cruise control lever on the steering column was broken. I don't mean the cruise didn't work, I mean the lever on the steering column was loose like she yanked it too hard. She returned it without a word. I noticed it the next time I drove it. I'm so angry that she knows she returned it in that condition, probably hoping I wouldn't notice. I'm in my senior years and on a fixed income and insurance won't pay for this repair. I don't want to pick a fight with her and make an accusation I can't prove, but I'm having a hard time letting go of her lack of consideration for her elderly mother. Should I mention this to her so I can let it go and risk the possibility of her being angry with an accusation?
Angry with Daughter

Dear Angry with Daughter: A good rule of thumb is that if you lend to a family member or friend, expect to either not be repaid or have your items returned in poor condition. You can feel extra emotional or slighted if you think you've been taken advantage of by friends or family members. That aside, will you feel better having approached your daughter about the broken lever? How will you feel if she says she knows nothing about it? If you can ask about it without an accusatory tone, and be prepared to be satisfied with whatever her response, go ahead and let her know that the lever is broken.

Click Here to write to Dear Margaret.  Margaret Snow is a Life Coach in Ithaca, NY.

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