Archive: Arts & Entertainment

SMART TALK

by Dr. Verbos Metikulos


EMERGENCY EVENT: As alumni of the Center for English as a First Language know, we spend much of our time treating patients for redundancy use. These patients tend to represent certain professions: litigation, education administration, and law enforcement.

Our friends in law enforcement and their imitators appear to use redundancies to sound self-important, add to the word count of reports, get more air time, or all three. We'll hear at a high rate of speed instead of at a high speed or fast. We know speed is a rate, folks. A car will be blue in color as if we didn't know what blue means.

Now we have "event," a favorite redundancy of the mindless. Stores don't have sales any more; they have sales events. Our founder didn't have a heart attack; he had a cardiac event. Maybe we should break out the balloons and ribbons.

And law enforcement, with their pilot fish, the TV reporters (not to be confused with journalists) speak of an emergency event. If it's not an emergency, should we worry? Watch for a notice beginning In the event of an emergency event...

Sounds festive.

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